Woke up this morning and my body aches. Couldn't find a good position to sleep last night. Kept waking up when I finally did fall asleep because the damn CARR brothers kept popping into my head. I kept dreaming I'd hear the doorbell and when I went to see who it was I could see the CARR brothers silhouettes outside of my door. Talk about panic. sooo not much sleep. I think I hurt mainly because I am depressed today. I miss my dad. Everyone's status is "see you later today dad" and "going to the lake with my dad" etc....and yes, I am jealous. I want to go back home and smell the grill cooking up hamburgers, see my mom whipping something up by the stove, and then see my dad walking up the back sidewalk, dollar store bags in each hand, as he always was doing on a picnic day. I can see his goofy smile and that one hand that never worked right holding the bags. my heart aches so much today. and the tears are unstoppable right now. How I wish I would have went home more often when I had the chance......
I love you dad. (and mom) I miss you both so much I can't even put it into words. I still call the home phone once in a while just in case...... I wish you were both here.
Lucy
I have been overweight for over half my life. The thin person inside of me is screaming to be let out but my obsession with food won't let it. This is my journey to become healthy again before it is too late.
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